Eulogy for power

By A badly drawn wobbler | Published 30 May 2024 | Updated 30 May 2024

Good mourning everyone,

We stand here today in darkness and gloom, as it is the 30th of May. Eskom has announced the beginning of stage 6 load-shedding for “dead power plants”, and has slain our power lines. They have brought the death of our beloved consistent power. It’s everlasting persistence will shortly come to an end. The candles aren’t just here to mourn for power, but to bring back what it provided. We’re already in loadshedding with three hours left on the clock. Round that up to three and a half factoring in the mourning of the workers distracting them from turning the power back on.

We’ve all had our memories of electricity. It was known for turning on our lights and microwaves. It saved our devices from dying a dark, low-powered death. It powered the very machine used to write this eulogy and the devices y’all used for getting this funerals invitation. It kept our food warm and us cool in the dreaded summer fever.

As a programmer, I have a strong connection with consistent power. Through the darkest of nights and the earliest of mornings, it stayed up with me. I am now left without my light in the darkness. I’ll have survive through the fire and flames now. Goodbye electricity, my dear friend.

Thank you.